Last Chance for Skinny

Hello fellow big pants people, today I weighed in at 183 lbs.  Is the fat melting off or is it just water weight?  Whatever it is, it feels good to see the scale go down and not up.  

Food:  

So yesterday's menu was 1 of Aunt Mar's Breakfast Bars, and an Avocado sandwich on black bread for lunch.  For dinner I just picked and had 4 broccoli poppers  drenched in battered greasy topping, a piece of bread, some tomatoes, a few chips and some black beans, I washed it down with a glass of wine but  I don't think I ate enough because today I feel really tired.  

Exercise:  

Walk the dogs (not very far), and I rode my bike for about 3 miles.  O.K. I know what you are thinking....I never ride my bike for 3 miles.  It was a fluke, but I'm going to try to continue to ride it a few times a week. 

Today I would like to talk about "Purging".  No that is not how I'm loosing the weight. Yesterday I began to clean out my closet and dresser drawers.  Cleaning out means throwing out.  Being lighter all around.  The less clutter and more organized you are, and the less junk you accumulate in general, makes you feel lighter in your head.  And it's all about feeling lighter, right girls?  Even if it is only in your head!  

Purging also makes you conscious of shopping.  Do I truly need all of this crap?  How many black sweaters do I really need?  Aren't eight enough?  Which leads me to question, How often do I wear black?  Well, for the past 3 days I've worn black, not because I look exceptionally nice in black, just because I think it makes me look thin.  Especially when I get dressed without my glasses on.  I can't see the rolls because everything just blurs together.  

Yes rolls of fat are streamlined with black clothing....but in the early 90's I packed up my black clothes because of a diet that preached that "thinness would come if we could just embraced our rolls of fat".  The philosophy of this diet was that girls got fat because they didn't like themselves....and by loving ourselves, the fat would simply melt off our bodies.  Bullshit!  No fat was melting off this body.  In fact I gained weight, because I developed an undeserved sense of entitlement!  I love myself therefore I can eat this double hot fudge sunday.  Bring on the love! But after stuffing my face for a good solid two weeks and thinking "Oh I can feel the love, I can just feel the love"......I could only feel the rolls.  How crazy right?  But when we are fat girls we try every crazy nonsensical thing out there.  So is the vegan diet just another crazy thing that I am doing?  Time will tell.  Signed, Last Chance for Skinny.